DOOBIES DOG HOUSE

It’s September 2013, Grand Theft Auto 5 had just released for reference - But at the same time we had another just as auspicious launch - The kickstarter to raise funds for Doobies Dog House had just gone live.

Doobie had been trying to make something of himself with a kickstarter - it's not going well despite his efforts with Advertising

Goons notice this kickstarter eventually in the Awful Kickstarter Thread

Unfortunately, this is Yet another monument to ultimate goon failure. To this day, the people who shelled out money to this "enterprise" are mocked.

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Eventually enough people talk themselves up and a full thread is made, posted by Forums Moderator Soundmonkey with a few rules

- only contribute what you can afford, don't go broke in some internet giving frenzy
- this is Dogman's shack, not ours, let's leave all the choices and decisions up to him
- if you have specific questions for Waye Wayne, post them in the thread and I'll sort of collect and relay them to him. We don't want to goonrush the poor guy's inbox.
- we have almost all forsaken our rewards, at least those involving him having to give away like a damn thousand free hotdogs (actually 943, as of this post)
- Wayne used his full name on Kickstarter, but his preference is Wayne, not Claude (although he doesn't seem to get offended)
- it's pronounced "REE-form", not "re-FORM"

On the very same day as the megathread post goes live- Doobies Dog House is fully funded We’re not really stopping here - At this point Doobies Dog House is the 4th most active kickstarter for that day on kickstarter . He's already set up a supply chain, and has a really well laid out budget. And the fact that he's crowdfunding instead of taking out a second mortgage and putting his families well being at risk is also smart. He's just not internet smart.

This kickstarter thread is truly an earnest attempt to do something nice for a man who just wants to sell hot dogs in a town full of people that do nothing but go to dollar general and shit themselves to death at Hamburger Larrys Burger Shack

Goons became addicted to this mans charm and decided to help him out - and in the end they raised over $14,000

Here's the links to the two kickstarters where you can see some of the madness for yourself

The Original Kickstarter
The Second Kickstarter

The OG Doobies Dog House Thread
The Thread Made Upon Opening

From here a tale of bad planning, yokel charm, and vent hood sadness kicks in with Funyun dreams eventually scuppped the home of the frog dog only coming to life for a few very short days

The vent hood got him. The vent hood gets everybody. A couple of updates later is him having to get a $2500 fire suppression system because the vent hood demands it. A warning to all first time restaurateurs: the vent hood hungers for you. The vent hood will ruin your life. You cannot install the vent hood yourself; only the vent hood's expensive minions may install the vent hood. Only the vent hood's elite roofers may cut a hole in the roof for the vent hood. The only mortals that the vent hood will speak to is inspectors, and these inspectors will not disclose the multitude of the vent hood's demands; instead they only pass one single commandment down to the restaurateur once very two weeks until the vent hood decides that it has properly dried you of funds to the point where you can open your business without enough money left for inventory.

Thank you forums user The Human Crouton for that one.

Also Doobie was a bit racist on Facebook - Thank you FYAD for finding that

For reference Reform was about 45% African American at the time. I dont think he’s the type of guy to be outwardly racist in person, - so the Racism isn't whites-only lunch counters and water fountains. It’ll manifest in stuff like this where i’m 100% sure he’s nothing but polite to his black coworkers and neighbours and then in the privacy of his own home he’ll be happy posting racist shit on the internet about fried chicken.



The Dogs
- Would you buy this for 5 bucks a pop?




The Store
At least this one had a shitter



The Menu
This is quite literally the only version i can find on the internet

As for the frog dog?
"Not possible.. Froggers stuff didn't come around til near end of funding .. Nice try tho.. Doobie's owns rights to frogdog and emblems. I can pretty much do what I want with it.. In this case I dropped it completely"

The Doob is flipping dogs in Doob Heaven

ALL THIS FOR 10 DOLLARS IS NOT AFFILIATED WITH SOMETHING AWFUL IN ANY WAY PLEASE DO NOT SUE ME THANK YOU